Laying aside the issues of women's "roles" in the church, the issue of women's ministries is still embarrassingly un- or under-addressed.
Currently at my church, the closest thing to an active women's ministry is the Wednesday night Beth Moore class. I'll admit that the Beth Moore studies are perhaps a little more indepth than the normal Bible class fare -- but that doesn't make them good.
The state of Bible classes in general is frustrating. I don't mean that all Bible classes should be along the lines of those offered at the grad school -- I don't think it's necessary for every Christian to learn Hebrew, Greek, Aramaic, and the historical-critical methods of interpretation (though I think it also wouldn't hurt...). I just think that a Bible class ought to teach.
Beth Moore has arguably made a small dent in the lack of material for women's classes in particular. But it's not enough; it's not adequate. And it's not even that good.
I don't want just to complain. I want to do something. But I honestly have no idea where to start. In a church of roughly 1200+ in which the topic is rarely (if ever) addressed, I haven't got a clue how even to begin.
As far as structure, I've actually been looking at men's ministries rather than traditional women's ministries: women and men today face many of the same problems, temptations and situations in every day life. The needs a women's ministry must address are no longer exclusively learning better child care tactics and how to make a good casserole. Those are important parts of ministry -- developing strong mothers and feeding the hungry -- but they aren't all relevant for all women. Not all women can cook. Not all women are "naturally" good with children. And many women today don't intend to get married -- and those who do are waiting later and later in life to do so. So what ministries are relevant to those who don't have husbands or children, are young professionals earning their places in what was once believed to be a man's world?
There are temptations today that are common to age groups regardless of gender. In much the way Promise Keepers works, so ought there to be a corresponding women's ministry.
And whether a church believes women can serve in "official roles" or not, women need to be shown where opportunities to serve lie. By the time the young men are beginning to be trained to give lessons, lead prayers, serve communion, and to lead singing, the young women are being told (again) about dating and finding a good Christian mate. No wonder we lose so many girls around the age of 16: they're being taught that if they aren't interested in becoming wives and mothers, there's really no place in God's church for them -- any other talents they may have or may think they have are irrelevant. It's sad, but this is the message many young girls are getting.
I work with girls in their early to mid teens at Christian camps in the summer. I've volunteered with countless youth groups. There is a need there that is being unmet and, worse, largely ignored. They're disillusioned by the repeated implication that God only intends for men to serve and women to ... do what? They don't know. None of them could give an answer to that question.
So what are women to do? This is why we need at the very least a stronger women's ministry, a system of women to teach and to mentor other women.
5 comments:
Quiara,
Keep those thoughts coming. I, too, am struggling with this challenge of what we women need to be doing to nurture ourselves and other women. In the back of my mind, I feel like I have been called into women's ministries, and my current circumstances may be preparing me for that role, but they also seem to be squelching opportunities, as well. But, perhaps my real deterent is that I am just not sure what I would do differently and I can't see a reason to do more of the same.
Beth Moore is at least a start and probably the best thing I have seen come along in women's ministries. What do you think is the next step? What is it that would help to develop women, regardless of their marital status or position in or out of the traditional workforce?
And as far as young adolesent girls, what do you think needs to happen in order for those who do not want to pursue wife and motherhood to feel that they have a vital place in the life of the local church?
I really don't know what it'd take yet. Right now, I'm learning to listen. There are others with similar frustrations and they've got plenty to say. I'm trying to figure out what more women need from a women's ministry -- by listening, in part, to their excuses re: why they're not more involved. I've also e-mailed the church to find out more about starting a women's ministry of some sort -- what steps we'd need to take, how we could promote it, that sort of thing.
I really think God will open opportunities. There's a need for this. Otherwise, our young women are going to be constantly subjected to the Gospel of God Likes Boys Better (tm). I don't think (most) churches mean to send that message, but so many do it whether they realize it or not.
The Gospel can't be good news if it's not good news for women, too. If the only message of the church to women is "Become part of us and watch yourself be devalued instantaneously!" it's not going to go far in battling the world's message "Come with us and you can be anything."
I really think God's word and Christ's body has a better message than that.
I, too, am learning to listen.
I am not sure where this fits in our discussion, but as a middle school counselor, I am at a loss as to how to reach girls who feel that their worth lies in pleasing boys sexually. I have all the programs in place, but the message itself is not making a visible difference. The community where I work is less than 4,000 in pop. Our middle school has about 225 to 250 students. This past year, there were at least four girls, ages 13 and 14 who were having sex with the same guy. These were non-church goers, and their socio-ecomomic class was varied; but there are quite a few girls who have gotten pregnant who are regular church goers, their parents have an intact marriage, are upper-middle class and have college degrees. In addition, many have grandparents living in the same community.
When my daughter was in high school, and we were still going to church in this community, most of the boys who attended church with us were pretty responsible guys, but most of the girls were pretty wild and promiscuous or had reputations that direction. My daughter had a fairly strong internal locus of control, but she was pretty lonely during high school and had difficulty finding friends who held to the same standards.
I know that this is a different slant than talking about young professional women who want to be valued apart from the traditional female role and who struggle with their place in the corporate church, but we also have young ladies who have a (perverted)picture of a traditional role and are falling prey to it.
It's the adolescent girls I worry about, too, and for much the same reasons. The girls I work with at camps are 12 -16 years old -- and quite a few of them have just those issues. Others have issues that are probably better not discussed in the public comments of an open blog, but issues just the same.
I think that even for girls who are churchgoers (whatever brand) -- I think the "logic" goes something like this: women are meant to be wives and mothers (or so they're told). Women are valued for their ability to become wives and mothers -- not for their intelligence or talents. I'm afraid the church is giving the same message as is the world as to what the valuable parts of a woman are. I'm not altogether surprised at the result.
If you want to discuss this via e-mail, you can either e-mail me at asqmh @ yahoon.com or at quiara @ gmail .com Feel free to continue to comment here, though, if you'd rather. This is a concern about which I am apt to be extremely passionate.
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